Pen Ball

My very writing of this topic without collaborating with one of the other founding members will be highly controversial. This is serious business.

Pen Ball is a game we invented by accident. It started with a couple of the guys tossing a rubber ball back and forth across the showroom. Nothing strange there, we toss footballs and such around frequently. But they found a certain amount of perfection in being able to remain seated at their desks, and toss what would become the regulation 2" Superball to eachother by bouncing it once on the tile floor.

It started as a dare. "I bet you can't hit this pen if I lay it here." And a game greater than BASEketball could ever hope to be was instantly born.

In front of each opponent is a 4x4 section of colored tile. A pen lays in the center. But not any random pen, it must be a regulation Eagle Warranty pen. The object is simple- hit the pen in front of your opponent with the ball. The detailed rules would come over the next few days with much brainstorming, debate, and voting. We could easily fill the inside of a Monopoly box-top with our strict rules.

-You must remain behind your 4x4 square, and both players must be seated when throwing.

-You must knock the pen completely out of the grout line to score a point, simply hitting it or even causing it to move is not enough.

-If you hit anything other than the floor (such as a desk, or the ceiling) first with the ball, that is a foul and you will lose 3 turns as a penalty.

-When a point is scored, the opposition is given one "retaliation shot". If the retaliation shot results in a score, the two points cancel each other out.

-If a point is scored in the first 3 volleys of a set, there will be no retaliation shot.

-During a retaliation shot, your opponent is permitted to stand and taunt you.

-If a wild ball is not immediately recovered by the defensive player, the offensive player may challenge, and recover it themselves (violently if necessary), resulting in loss of turn for the defense.

-Players switch sides after a point is scored.

-First player to 3 points wins.

After the rules were made official, we decided to name our new creation Pen Ball. "Pennis", like a combination of "Pen" and "Tennis", was voted down due to it's resemblence to the name of a certain body part.

And so began the greatest passtime in used car history. Many great battles are fought over that Pen Ball court to this day. We've had many the controversy, including the asterisking of one player's entire record after a random drug test confirmed the use of performance enhancing drugs. That also got him fired, but that was of course secondary to the effect it had on the game.